Sunday, June 18, 2006


Update From Camel-Land!

Salam :-)
Salutations of Peace from the depth of my earthly being,

I know, finally here is an update ..

Still awaiting the Hospital to send my notes to the GP so I can get a referral for the Rheumatologist. My last visit with the Consultant was along the lines of: Yes you have Rheumatism.. and that's it?!

Other than that I feel so dar tired most days..

We had 'The' meeting at work last month also. The Capability Hearing with 8 people. Crikey it was so :-/

I didn't realise I deserved such special treatment. My Managers are super-duper lovely people and they spent the last x minutes praising me (I just could not stand it) and my ego was kinda getting way too big :-D
On a serious note though, I've never really met such kind folk. Very nice people.

I outlined the reasons why I wanted to leave the mental health field and also why I wish to (temporarily) leave the teaching field. I just don't feel it's a good decision to jump back into teaching after being on sick-leave for such a long time. I was told I'd be notified within a week but got the brown envelope alot sooner!

I thought it would be:
Let's call it a day chum :-)

But no -

I was sent a list of 10 internal posts which were non-teaching roles and felt even more :-/

After discussing with a good friend whom I started teaching with back in the days, we came up with a job that I wrote an application for and await an answer. I should get some feedback within the next week or so. And how do I feel about all this?

Gosh don't even ask.

The present artshow in Cardiff is going well. My Black Kabah piece: Change has been sold. Alhamdulila. Very much chuffed about that!

I am currently trying to make some work for the IslamExpo event in London taking place the first week of July. I thought I'd re-do the Black piece again :-) But it's not proving an easy task doing art these days. My fingers are still feeling very stiff and in pain.

That has to be the 'No Entry Zone'.

I sent an application for Incapacity Benefit after my return from Pakistan, together with 2 other pieces of paperwork. And isn't it odd: they only recieved 2 out of the 3 forms? Which of course meant that I had to re-do another form and despatch it off! Do people actually realise how difficult and cumbersome it is to ask individuals to re-do forms? On another note, I called the Job Centre regarding where my sick-note should be posted to and was told to post it to the 'same place where you posted it last time' !!!!

Well - dime-bar me can't remember where I posted it last time as my previous one was ages ago! And only then I was given an address. It is really amazing walking into the Job Centre: you get this look as if you're dumb, thick and stupid.

My finances are absolutely messed up. I keep getting pop-up messages from the bank asking me to put an over-draft facility in place or to take out a loan. No I am not tempted.

I have almost given up hope of the Benefits System helping me in time - oops correction: I mean I'm not relying upon getting that money soon at all! I am hoping that more of the artwork will get sold some time sooney :-) So pretty people reading this, if you happen to know of anyone wanting artywork - send them this way!

We have now purchased a very light-weight vacuum cleaner so that I can clean my room without too much trouble. We keep this upstairs and the big masculine thing stays downstairs. Also we have purchased a light-weight iron from Mr Philips :-)

It is still hard for me to reach for certain things without knocking others over and thus maintain a neat environment 24/7. And yes, at times some things which I have 'put down' do tend to stay there for over a week. By the end of a week, my desk is littered with letters, stationery, books and other bits and pieces which look at me and ask for them to be kindly put back into their appropriate places.

Life is returning to some form of normality.. But I am becoming more of a hermit as each day passes :-/

I find it amazing at times what has happened and how things have shaped out.

I know God is the Helping Friend, Al-Waliyy

I know God is the Just, Al Adl

I know God is the Provider, Ar-Razzaq

I know God is the All-Wise, Al-Hakim

and I know that He will once again Give Life as Al-Muhiy and bring Light to my world as An-Nur.

Until then though, I believe I do have the right to get a little tearful when things occasionally get a bit overwhelming for the residents at Camel-Land :')

Peace & Prayers,
Wasalam, love and duas
Bint-eh Adam

*artwork: Finding God / 2006
Acrylics on Board / Size: A5
Selling at £5 per piece in a set of 10

Salams Bint-eh-Adam,

Dude, you totally have the right to get a little tearful when things get overwhelming, heh- just remember, water in camel-land is a precious commodity and so are your tears eh? :) Take your time sorting yourself out and just relaxing as well.. with the domesticated bit, be slightly innovative to get over any obstacles. For example, problems vacuuming? Problems no more! Just plant grass seeds over your carpet, water daily for 6 weeks and order in a flock of Welsh woolly sheep to devour the grass and the underlying carpet fluff, and the vacuum problems remain no more!! Genius, eh? ;p

Hope everything is going okay for you sweets, insha'Allah, and making du'a. :)

Lots of luv,
(stargazer at gmail dot com) :)
Walaikumslam you :-)

Thanks for your creativity my dear - I like!!

I guess things aren't as bad as they could be.. As God Almighty only gives us what we can cope with. But I think the reality is that we do need to accept our limitations at times. Man should never think he has strength to do things beyond his abilities, yet saying that he should remember he is one unique being on this Planet.

A middle-ground understanding between the two ways of thinking.

Our society tells us not to get emotional about our problems and not to cry out loud about them. I don't think that is entirely fair. We are also taught by many people to be like the 'strong believers' and that is all fine. However it is not right for people to assume we are super-duper heros or bionic people that won't be affected by our circumstances. We will! And at times we will want to let out our emotions too.

It is only natural to grieve at ones' situation as we are people who have hearts where lies the centre of our emotional identity. And what alot of people have failed to remember is that we are allowed to grieve because we have one to grieve to: He is the One who will Console us.

*Will email you soon stargazer :-)
Wasalam, duas too
Bint-eh Adam x x x
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